Lord Tanuki - Secretary - RPLOG

Participants

• Fenris
• Nuku

Date

14/1/2016

Log

Fenris trots along down the streets of Fairhaven, his spear and sword bouncing on his back as he goes. Somewhere, the tubby tanuki has acquired half of a police uniform. The upper half. Since the lower half probably wouldn't fit. His glittering badge is marked 'Sgt. Chubbs,' and one can only imagine where he managed to find it. He slows to a walk as he arrives at the little japanese shrine and approaches it meekly and not without some real trepidation. "Uhm," he says, and coughs before continuing, "I'm Fenris," he says to the shrine, or to the empty air, or to the statues, "I-I was hoping that I could get an audience with Lord Tanuki, uh, the Great Leaf." He bites his lip and looks around awkwardly. This was stupid. It would never work.

There is a stillness in the air, almost palpable before it's shattered with a soft breeze. Leaves dance and play, crisp and brown despite being deep January, circling around Frenris' feet a moment before they kicked up into a little tornado of force. Standing there as the leaves disperse is a slender female tanuki with a kindly smile. "Hello! His eminence is quite busy and can't see every petitioner." She reached up to adjust her glasses as she looked at a clipboard that wasn't in her paws a moment before. "Let's see... Ah. Perhaps I can assist? I may not have the direct bounty of The Great Leaf, but who does, save himself?"

Fenris bows low at the emmisary, stunned into silence and more than a little surprised that anything had happened at all! "Thank you for answering," he says, still bowed low, "I, well, I am not sure what exactly I need," he admits, "I recently began following the Tanuki way, with a little help from The Great Leaf and now. . . well, now I find that I am not sure what to do next. I have not exactly had any teachers or anyone to show me how to be a tanuki." He sneaks a glance at the woman and her clipboard.

She tucks the clipboard behind herself, and her hands come free without it. "You've chosen well. The Tanuki way is one of pleasure and delight, but also discovery, for yourself, and those around you." She bounced closer as if walking weren't good enough. "You have questions, and that's good! All good tanuki are full of questions and dares, of others and their own, but which answers will you find, hmm? The seeking is a great part of that fun." She leaned in closer, nose a few inches away. "What do you think, when you think Tanuki?"

Fenris straightens up, feeling the closeness of the other Tanuki. "I don't know," he says, thinking, "I guess I think friendly and welcoming? I mean, I think I like playing tricks on people too, but never to hurt anyone." He takes a deep breath, getting a noseful of the woman very nearly sharing his space. "I just wonder if there is something that I should be doing for the Great Leaf her in Fairhaven, is all." he says, "I mean, I know that other tanuki are out there, but I just don't feel like I am part of the plan. . ."

She smells of cedar with soft traces of a female, all under a bed of what smells like some kind of cherry perfume that gently tickles at the nose without being too bold. "These are good things, all of those things, but we don't play tricks just to play tricks, though a good laugh is sometimes its own reward." She tapped a cheek. "Better that lessons are learned, to say nothing of all the things we want to learn. Some say we are insane and reckless, but I'll tell you the truth." She leans in, snout almost brushing, whiskers tickling at his ears. "These are pranks we play on ourselves."

Fenris finds that he is leaning further and further back as the woman gets closer and closer until he tips back and lands on his well padded rump. "Oof!" he huffs, then blushes hard under his fur, "Then what do I do?" he asks, both embarrassed and hopeful, then he frowns a little bit in confusion, "What do you mean, pranks we play on ourselves?"

She points at Fenris with a little titter. "Well, look at yourself. You came looking for answers, and there you are, on your rump in front of one trying to help. Why are you in this shameful state when you should be leaning in to listen and speaking your questions in turn, hmm? This is part of being a Tanuki. Easy answers are boring. Easy life is boring." She spread out her arms. "The chase, on the other hand, there's great fun to be had, of your own, or convincing someone else to do the running." She reached back, producing that clipboard. "Do you understand?"

Fenris nods, gently hooks a pudgy paw behind the graceful tanuki's nearby leg and PULLS! "I think I am starting to get the idea," he says with a grin.

She squeals in surprise, her clipboard fluttering through the air, vanishing as if eaten away by something even as she collapses to the ground with a soft 'oof'. "You little rascal." She wags a pen at him she wasn't holding before. "Best watch it with that one, some get rather testy about falling." She moved to stand up, rubbing her bottom. "Tanuki are built to absorb a good fall, thankfully."

Fenris laughs warmly and stands along with the female. "I could not let a lady stay standing while I sat!" he says amiably, his contented smile finding its way back to his face, then he bows low again, "I apologize. It seems I have much to learn about the Tanuki way. I submit myself as a wayward student. What must I do?" He sneaks a glance upward, and tilts his head. "How do you do that?" he finally asks, nodding at the pen she was certainly not holding a moment ago.

She glances at it before offering it towards him. "Some of it has to do with where I come from." She put her free paw on her chest. "I'm from our home world, where there are many Tanuki, and much, how you would call it, 'magic'? Not so much here." She gestures to where the clipboard vanished. "Conjured things vanish without it. Shame too..." It seems only then that she notices she's being bowed to and reaches out, gently tweaking an ear.

"Ow!" Fenris cries, more from surprise than actual pain. "So I can't conjure thngs?" he asks, just a little disappointed, "I've figured out some of the shapeshifting, like turning into objects and I can turn into lots of other things using the nanites here, but mostly people here think that Tanuki are only good for their big balls!" He casually slaps his tanuki endowments. "I want to show people that the Tanuki way is more than that! What should I do?"

She waves a paw through the air. "What you call nanites is the magic of this world. The Great Leaf hasn't figured out much of it, but maybe you could help." She leans in again, nose coming close. "You said you were looking for a purpose. If you brought him the secret of this world's magic, well, that would make you a very important tanuki. He would throw a party for you like no other." She tapped her cheek. "He might even let you immigrate to our world, if you wanted to." A hand lowered and she brushed his engorged balls. "I'm sure many tanuki would be happy to see you."

It says something about Fenris that he seems to honestly be more excited by the prospect of a feast than the other tanuki's hand on his family jewels. He does not lean away this time, though and as she comes closer he leans in the rest of the way and gives her a little peck on the nose. "You think he would do that?" the tubby tanuki asks, "But I don't see how he does not have it figured out already. I mean, the nanites are everywhere inside the server bubbles!"

Her nose dances, whiskers going askew at being kissed and bringing a light-hearted giggle from her. "Of course he would. He loves a reason to celebrate, and that would be one large reason." She tilts her head at his explanation. "What is a 'server' exactly? I see no bubbles? Can you explain it differently? How do we make them perform magic." She snaps out a few fingers suddenly, capturing a bit of light. "See, here are some, but they do not listen when I command them, then they float away."

Fenris frowns in concentration for a second, trying to think of how to explain this. "You have magic inside of you, right?" he asks, "It comes from you personally, or from other tanuki. We don't have that kind of magic. We have to use objects with magic in them and the nanites deliver that magic around. A Server is sort of a magic box that gives the nanites their power. Does that makes sense?"

She blinks slowly before a frown overtook her face. "Alright... So how do we tell it what to do?" She pointed at the light just before it dispersed, and did nothing. "It is very rebellious. The magic in me listens to my will." She clapped her paws and fashioned a blade of light between them, suddenly stabbing forward, but where it struck and pierced flesh, it dissolved, creating an intense ticklish sensation.

Fenris cries out and scrabbles away, only to find that the sword did not pierce him. He does his best to shake it off and goes back to trying to give his best explanation about nanites. "uh," he says nervously, "They can't work beyond a certain range of the magic box, that is why we call it a bubble. . . uh." He can't quite get past it. "What was that all about?" he asks, checking his abdomen once more for holes.

She flashes a smile. "The longer you hold it in, the worse it'll get." Her tail starts to sway left in a rhythmic motion. "You can resist it, if you like. I'm enjoying watching you try. Now, it sounds to me, what we need is a magic box. Fetch him one of those, so he can control the magic! Then you'd be a true hero of all the Tanuki!"

"Hold it in?" he asks, still feeling that strange tingling sensation, "Hold what in?" He coughs and squirms a little, then continue to try to explain. "The box only makes the nanites work," he says, "Controlling them is a little different." He holds out a hand and suddenly he is holding an enormous sword, at least as long as he is tall and almost as wide as he is. "There is another little box," he explains, "One inside of my head that lets me sort of. . . talk to the nanites and tell them what to do."

Her ears go up curiously and she dances away from the blade and its wielder. "You think you can return the favor? You'll be laughing on the ground before you finish poking me with that." As she promised, that tickling only gets worse and worse by the moment. The more its held back, the worse it gets. "But that won't help us get the magic box, or control this tricky magic."

"What?" Fenris asks, squirming a bit more at the strange tickling sensation, "What did you do?" He waves the sword around like it waves nothing and tosses it into the air where it vanishes. "I can't actually make things," he admits, chuckling involuntarily, "I can only make illusions with the nanites. My own *SNORT* NICE, uh, magic box, *GRUNT* isn't very strong."

She bounced forward a little. "Your own box? You _have_ one? Clever boy! Quickly, give it over and I'll bring it to him straight away." She extended a paw. "I might even stop it if you do, or not. I'm still undecided about that..."

Fenris laughs warmly and openly, without the influence of whatever magic has been used on him. "Then let's go!" he grins brightly, "Because you literally, *SNORT* can't take it without me." He taps his head lightly. "We are sort of part and parcel," then the tanuki starts to squirm and struggle against whatever magic is cast on him.

That catches her offguard, the slender tanuki woman pouting lightly before she suddenly becomes not so slender as if she let her fat go and became rounded and pudgy. "How did you? Oh well, I suppose the why's are less important. I'm going to kidnap you now, alright?" Her paws became covered in swirling eddies of fog. "Alright?"

Fenris literally has no idea what is going on as he chuckles and grunts against the strange tickling attack. He is in no condition to argue.

She lunges forward in a tidal wave of jovial fat, ropes appearing in her pudgy fingers as she quickly begins to tie up her soon-to-be guest. "I'm sorry about this, but you said it yourself. Besides, you wanted a party! We'll get one of those after we figure out how the box works." She gives a sharp yank and turns, Fenris now tied up and slung against her back. "Comfortable?" She asks as she walks back towards the center of the dedication point.

"Very!" Fenris says, laughing, "Wh-why the ropes?" he asks, grunting and chuckling, "I- I would have just come with you!" The tubby tanuki clamps down on his own mind and emotions, deciding it is time to take back a little control. Maybe he can fight off this strange tickle torture.

She raps on the dedication point itself. "I have one to bring with me, open it wide... Wider... Like someone has a treat for you... A big treat. Damn it, wider!" She stomped a paw and a great circle of energy sprang up before them. "That's better." She glanced back at her rider. "This may get a little dizzy." She steps forward between worlds, proving her words an understatement as one experiences being everywhere and no where at once for forever and an instant before crashing against her back in a new world softly scented of cherry blossoms and pine.

"Whee!" Fenris cries out as he is dragged away through the portal, chuckling and laughing as he goes. "Wh-why are you doing this?" he asks through the laughter, "I would have just c-come!"

She perks an ear back at him. "Well, I could have done that, and you might have, and you might have fallen between worlds, to hurtle between stars forever." She dropped him suddenly to the ground and wheeled about. "This way seemed safer, mister treasure. Now where's that box exactly?"

It's no good. Fenris can't hold on any longer. The tanuki succumbs to the tickling and the laughter, and whatever it is that comes with it. Though it does have the added bonus of keeping him from answering questions just now.

As promised, the laughter bursts free even more powerfully for how long it was held back. The femme-tanuki began to chuckle, then laughs right along as her form grew larger by the moment. With the sound of two bowling balls falling into place, she becomes a he, and a large one at that, easily matching his body mass with a bear. "Oh, silly follower. I told you not to hold it in. That's alright, no one listens to me anyway."

"He-Hello Lord Tanuki," Fenris gasps through gales of laughter, "G-good to see you!" The tanuki does his best to reach up and tap at his temple. "B-b-boox!" he roars with laughter and rolls around bound on the ground.

The great tanuki tilts his head in consideration before he reaches for Fenris and plucks him up right by the head, trapped between his paws, laughing or not. "Your head isn't that large. How magic is this box if it can fit in there, and why would you store it in there of all the places you could have put it. Magic goes ON heads, not in them."

"W-works w-with b-brain power!" he says, still gasping from the laughter, "M-made special!" The tanuki is sort of confused at this point. Why would the Great Leaf be treating him so roughly?

Down he goes, setting Fenris on his feet. "There you are." The Great Leaf leans around afterwards quickly, peeking into an ear... No box, hmm. "You wanted my attention, you have it!" He clapped his heavy paws twice and suddenly Tanukis began emerging from all directions. "Prepare a meal! Our guest is waiting."

"C-complicated," Fenris says, slowly coming down from the high of the spell, "I tried to explain earlier. Th-the box is only a metaphor. It is a tiny machine that is imbedded in my skull that lets me talk to the nanites. Some people are better at it than others, but with practice it can be learned. And if you meet someone who is good at a particular skill, you can learn it from them if they have a NICE unit too." The chubby coon-dog perks up at the mention of food.

Snap! His noise draws one of the tanuki scurrying forward, bearing a bottle. "Here, this has some your world's magic. Can you make it do something?" He held up the jar towards Fenris, smiling hopefully. All around, other Tanuki are busily setting up a big table and platters of tasty morsels begin to emerge with unusual speed.

Fenris looks at the jar and slowly shakes his head. "I don't think so," he admits, maybe this had all been a very bad idea, "The bubble doesn't extend here." He bites his lip and tries again. "There is no magic box here," he says, "The little one I have does not supply the magic, it just lets me talk to the magic. Just like your magic does not work in Fairhaven, Fairhaven's magic does not work here."

"I think I can use some power to change myself a little, but I think that is all I can do here."

"Well... It works a little, close to the point of entry." He grumbles a little, then perked right up. "Wait! You still have the magic, the magic talking magic! If you let me at least get a nice solid imprint of that, that would be lovely. A start, at least." He holds up two fingers. "A little morsel on our way to the real food."

"Well, yes?" Fenris says, finally coming off whatever the tickle magic was, "If you can figure it out." The tubby tanuki reaches up and taps a spot at the base of his skull. "My magic box is right here," he says, "in my skull. It is very small, but it lets me talk to the magic in my world when there is a big magic box close enough. But why do you want that magic?" he asks, "Isn't the magic of this world better?"

"Magic is Magic." He shrugs softly. "Different worlds, different magic. Us knowing it would give us an edge over those tail-biting kitsune, and they would turn so many colors with jealousy! Ooo, just imagine them running around, screaming to their god with frustration." He giggles at the thought of it. "Now, this may tickle a moment, but not so bad as last time." Swat! He buries Fenris in his big balls a moment. "Mmm, that does feel strange."

"Mmph!?" is all Fenris has time to say before he finds himself shoved face first into his Lord and Master's own tanuki endownment. He has certainly been tossed about today. And all this over just trying to figure out how to be a better tanuki!

Pop! He pulls Fenris free and throws an arm over his shoulders. "There, enough of that. You did your part, and I'm a man of my word!"

One of the passing Tanuki snickers. "You aren't even a man."

"I heard that! The food better be ready!"

Fenris is not totally sure whatt just happened, but the promise of food and the personal attention of Lord Tanuki certainly make up for it. "I'm glad to be of service," he says, a little disoriented from all the tossing around and the. . . intimacy with Lord Tanuki.

He leads the way to the table, heaped tall with various meats and sweet things in equal abundance. "So, are you still unsure what it means to be a tanuki? Well, that's it, really. We love ferreting out answers, good company, and uncomfortable questions." He slapped Fenris on the back. "I hope I didn't make you -too- uncomfortable. Miss the secretary? I wasn't trying to be rude, I assure. You're one of my own, and today, You're a hero!"

Fenris grins, happy to be the man, or in this case, tanuki of the hour. "I guess I just wanted a little direction," he says amiably, straightening his acquired police uniform, "Um, I am happy to be of service!"