Flexible Survival - User contributions [en]

Monster Writing Guide

2012-11-21T23:55:10Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
'''Don't Panic.'''

This guide is meant to be an addition to the normal 'help monster writing'
helpfile, but while the former is more about the general rules of monster
writing, along with an aid for the coding possibilities, this should be seen as
a guide for good writing, and an inspiration.

Ultimately, the things written herein will be what the quality of the monster
will be judged by, not only by staff, but hopefully also by you. Onward!

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide

2012-11-21T23:54:38Z

Ambro:

Monster Writing Guide: Page 7

2012-11-21T23:54:02Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== Closing Words ==

In the end, the important parts of a critter are creativity, and fueling the
imagination of the players. Interesting, well written and creative mobs are a
delight to many, and things like the Quilled Tousky or Feesh even inspire
special commands and mini-games, just because the critter stands out so much as
a rememberable, unique thing.

Not every critter can be expected to match that. And it's not necessary. As long
as the mob you write is well done, well executed and written with this being a
purely text-based, imagination-fueling medium in mind, everything is alright.

But most importantly: Have fun. Take your time. This is not a newspaper, and
we don't have to release a new mob every week. Even after you wrote your
critter, let it rest for a day, think about it. Chances are, you will get a
sudden new idea, behavior or thing to add to it. Flesh it out, til you are
satisfied with the image.

I hope this guide helped you, and will ultimately make the only reasons for a
rejection and necessary re-submitting due to pure technical reasons like
mistakes in code.

Thank you for having taken your time to read this, and I hope it helped you.

--Ambrosia

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

Page 7 - Closing Words

Monster Writing Guide: Page 6

2012-11-21T23:53:31Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== Victory do's and dont's ==

Victories can fall into similar traps that descriptions can. Actually, the
first rule to avoid mistakes there is one we already heard before:

'''Always consider that a player might have mixed up mutations!'''

This does not particularly matter for the victory the critter imposes on
the player, -however- as soon as the victory is on the player's hand (or
crotch, as the case may be), you need to be careful. Victory messages, first
and third person, done by the player, should either:

1. Not be specific about the player's mutations aside of the groin, or

2. Use code to check the individual mutation parts of the player and adjust
accordingly.

To be honest, there are -a lot- of victories that violate this rule, and are
on the grid. It's not hard to find them, either. A lamia player wrapping around
the victim despite having legs, a tarragon player vomiting acid on the prey
despite only the groin being tarragon. Many of these victories actually come
from a time where checking for the other bodyparts was not possible. Maybe
they will get fixed one day, maybe not. But now that we have the ability to do
such checks, past mistakes should not get repeated.

Likewise, victories, player and critter alike, should do checks for organ
sizes. The victory 'stretching the defeated to bursting' becomes rather silly
if the defeated person is a giant, and you are fairy sized. The same goes for
the body size. While this aspect of victories is not as important as the check
for bodyparts, as it does not quite as much break the illusion, it still can
have a highly positive effect on the creativity of the victory message, and
makes it more immersive and believable.

Also:

'''As soon as genitals matter, write a victory message for each victor and prey gender combination that matters for that victory'''

Male vs. male, male vs. female, female vs. female, herm vs male, herm vs
female, herm vs. herm, Male vs. Neuter, Female vs. Neuter, Herm vs. Neuter,
Neuter vs. neuter.

Quite a lot of combinations there, eh? Not all need to be used. There might be
no diference between a male or a herm abusing a female, or a herm or female
getting their hands on a male, which removes the amount of necessary combi-
nations. Likewise, with the victor being neuter, the gender or the defeated
might not matter...but it could.

It all depends on the theme of the victory message and critter in question.
Note down all necessary combiations that apply to your case before writing the
victories.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 5

2012-11-21T23:53:15Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== Keeping Things Interesting ==

So we keep things, again, non-technical; And by keeping it non-technical, we
come to the golden rule of victories:

'''Make your victories interesting to read'''

You might have noticed that the rule ends with 'Interesting to read'. Why the
'to read' part? Well, because the act described by the victory does not
necessarily need to be interesting in itself.
Sounds confusing? Imagine an enemy. An enemy that, upon defeating you, simply
walks away.

''"As you lay defeated, the creature turns and walks away."''

Well. That's not very interesting. I'll be frank here and say: That's boring. You
fought a fight to the death, and the thing just turns and walks away. To the
reader, that's bland and not very interesting. But ask anybody who ever got
beaten up like that, and they will probably tell you, that it was a very intense
moment that certainly was far from being uninteresting! So let's try to recreate
that atmosphere, while keeping the simple, mundane act of the creature walking
away:

''"As you break down, beaten and bruised, the creature holds still. Their eyes simply lower, following you onto the ground, keeping you in their sight. As you lay, ready and vulnerable to that last, final blow...none comes. The creature simply sneers, their expression showing an utter disgust at your weak, defeated form. They elegantly turn on their feet, straightening, before they move away with the same predatory stride and confidence they approached you with, their mercy...or perhaps your unworthyness...leaving you alive but humiliated on the ground."''

The very same act, the creature simply turning and moving away. But we have
detail, we have atmosphere, even a little tension there! Naturally the latter
will be gone upon reading it over and over, but first impressions do a -great-
deal when encountering a new critter on the grid. It also shows something else:
The critter's -attitude- and some of its -mindset- be it feral or sane, dumb or
intelligent, humble or proud.

All that from not the action itself, but -how- it was done.

'''Describe not only what a creature does on defeating you, but how it does it.'''

A simple rule, but the above example shows how much it can do. Next we'll go
into some do's and especially don't of victories.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 3

2012-11-21T23:52:59Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== The hills have eyes. Your arms don't. ==

''"Of course my arms don't have eyes, Ambrosia you silly billy!"''

Well, yes, but that's not the point.
Looking back at the description I put on the last page, you might notice the
following part:

''"The legs, just like the arms, are powerful and predatory, clearly built for chasing potential pray, and chasing it with an impressive speed."''

Aside of the typoing of the word 'prey' (Did you catch it earlier?), lovely legs
there. Would hate to go into a running competition with that one. BUT!
Remember that while the above description might perhaps make perfect sense on
your critters, you always, always need to consider a player having mixed
mutations.

Let me repeat that:

'''Always consider that a player might have mixed up mutations!'''

So, hence my comment about your arms not having eyes. The arms don't know what
the legs look like. The legs don't know what the torso looks like. The forms a
player ends up with will potentially, at some point, be mix and match, so a
bodypart simply must not reference another bodypart. No matter if the arms are
'just like' the legs, no matter if they are 'similar to the head', etc. etc.

It's an absolute nono, and the most potential pitfall is describing the exterior
of the bodyparts on the bodyparts themselves, like feathers or the color or
texture of the skin. '''There is an extra skin bodypart for that!'''

So, so far we are down to:

1. Be descriptive, and be as detailed in your description as to give a good,
accurate image of the critter

2. Don't repeat yourself! Use synonyms, describe what limbs might potentially be
for, always keep in mind that bodyparts might not just be individual mutations,
but also should be non-annoying to read on the singular critter description.

3. At the same time, do not make one bodypart reference another, because of the
exact aformentioned possibility of the bodyparts being mix and matched on a
player. Or even critter!

''"Ha, but I'm making the occulaoctopus! It has eyes on its arms! What now??"''

Er..I give. But not the point. Moving on to the next page after this important
message:

'''Also always consider that a player might have a different gender!'''

That means the player might have breasts, when the normal critter does not.
They might be male, female, herm or even neuter!
Always use 'they' and 'their' instead of his/her/she/he etc. in the
descriptions. if you want a literal "They", simply wrap it in brackets: [They]

''"Are we done with the descriptions yet???"''

Actually...

Actually yes, yes we are. With all the points and guides on the previous three
pages, you should have a good set of guidelines that hopefully will result in
imaginative, interesting to read, non-repetitive descriptions that do not fall
into the trap of mixed mutations and different genders, and should give people a
very good idea about what you are exactly imagining the critter to look like.

But looks aren't all that there is to a beast of the nanite apocalypse, is
there?
After all, Sally the cow might look adorable, but beware her fetish for having
you trampled beneath her mighty hooves!

Which brings us to the next page.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 2

2012-11-21T23:52:39Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. ==

Consider this description of arms (sans hand):

''"The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticeable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

That sounds fine, right? Quite does.
Now take a look at the description of these legs:

''"The fit and trained humanoid legs show noticeable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

Still fine! That's a fine set of legs there. I want to have that kind of legs.

And you go to describe the rest of the critter. It's all trained, toned, muscly.
I'd tap it. Or knowing the creatures around, they'd probably tap me first.

But how does it look when it's complete?

''"The torso is fit and trained, showing noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. A runners' legs, humanoid, fit and trained, show noticable shapes of veins on top of the impressive musculature."''

See how this got repetitive and annoying? And I even mixed some wordings around,
and changed a few, not even making all those descriptions exactly the same. But
large parts and word constellations are identical enough to show what can be
percieved as laziness or lack of care. It is just tiring to read, as if somebody
repeatedly says the same thing into your ear.

Always remember, the individual body parts must look nice and descriptive by
themselves, since they can be mixed individually on a player, but they -also-
need not to turn out to be repetitive in their descriptions if they all get put
together to form the complete, single critter.

A good help with preventing this from happening is, among things, the use of
different words on the different bodyparts to describe the very same thing,
along with changing order and tone of the description. Always keep a thesaurus
at hand when doing critters, as it is a great aid for finding synonyms. And not
even just synonyms, but different words that bring up the same image. Something
muscular can be toned, athletic, trained, predatory, something a runner or
bodybuilder would have, something that looks like the result of hard workouts,
simply strong, perhaps even of a lethal, predatory strength!

But you know what else takes part in making the above so repetitive? The last
example just now might have shown it; The length of each part's description. The
shorter each description, the more you're prone to repeat yourself when having
to describe the next, potentially similar themed and toned bodypart; A long
description makes it easier to make the descriptions seem different, less
repetitive, even if they are perhaps not. And how to make long descriptions?
See the previous page of this guide!

Okay, consider this:

''"The torso, broad and athletic, would make an athlete proud. It is very toned, yet not overly bulky, with the muscle's strength coming from an inherent, compact powerfulness more than sheer size, the pattern of trained muscle flowing down over the hard abdomen and back. The arms' shapes are firm, shapely tedeons beneath the exterior, able to deliver quick and dangerous blows at a notice. The legs, just like the arms, are powerful and predatory, clearly built for chasing potential pray, and chasing it with an impressive speed."''

There we go. The exact same kind of build was just described, but simply was
made more interesting with sheer variation. You might have noticed that not only
was the wording varied and the descriptions lengthened, but also the whole thing
was spiced up with short mentionings about what the limbs look like they could
potentially do or be used for. If I describe you a metal hammer that could be
used to hammer a nail in, and a metal hammer that could be used to tear down a
wall, I immediately gave you a good idea about how each hammer might be shaped
and sized.

So, that's a fine description, isn't it?

'''NOT!'''

We fell into a little trap there that shall be pointed out on the next page of
this guide.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 1

2012-11-21T23:52:18Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== '''A general guideline on how to write the descriptions.''' ==

Imagine a creature. We shall not talk about what this creature is named, or how
it behaves. That does not quite matter yet. No, we will be talking about what
this creature looks like.

''"This creature has feathers on its head, and a beak, and avian eyes."''

No errors there, no mistakes. But. Would you have been able to imagine the
creature? Perhaps. Roughly. You'd definitely get the image of a bird's head
popping up in your brain. But most importantly: Is it the same birdhead that the
writer of the creature intended you to see? Probably not. It is way too vague.
And that is a problem.

So, when writing monsters, here is the first, most important general rule:

'''Write the creature so that people looking at it, not knowing its name, see (almost) the same image in their head as you do.'''

It's a simple rule, but it is one that many writers do not think about. Which is
natural; The writer has the image of the critter in their head, they write a
description, and upon reading it, they naturally think of the image they had in
their head in the first place as it's still sitting there.

So do this: After writing the description, take a break. Forget all about the
creature's image you were thinking of. Distract yourself. Later, just read the
description, and simply using it paint an image in your mind. Now compare it. Is
it the same creature? Actually actively try to imagine the creature differently
from your original idea, as far as the description allows you to. Is it still
recognizable as the same creature you imagined? If not, your description is way
too vague. The more your description allows people to imagine the creature
differently than your original idea, the more it lacks detail.

"The creature's head is sleek and elegantly avian. A long, black and slightly
curved beak protudes from its face. It's a dark coal in color, and solid enough
to deliver hard blows, the tip coming to a pointy, slightly downward turned end.
The black feathers that cover the head are subtly shiny in their blackness,
depending on how the light falls on them. They are short, but frame the head
closely an densly, flowing backwards elegantly around the creature's equally
dark eyes."

Chances are, you just imagined a crow or raven head. All by adding details,
'fluff' to the same creature's description.

So, again: The less wiggle room the description leaves other player's
imagination to be different from the image you had in your head when you were
imagining the creature, the better. Do not let this drive you into being
overdetailed. You don't need to specify exact lengths, nor exact amounts, or ten
words to describe the color. In the end it does not matter if the raven, that
people are imagining, is 7 feet or 7 feet and 2 inches, or has a little more or
less feathers or muscles in their mind. But they should imagine that raven,
with its cold, cunning expression and those wicked, curved and nasty talons.

Page 1 - General description guideline

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 4

2012-11-21T23:51:47Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== A guide on writing your victory messages ==

Victories. We all thought ourselves to be invincible, but the truth is, for a
good part of the game getting beaten up is a fairly common occurrence. But
unlike many games, this one can give delight in defeat!

Each critter should display a nice message when the player gets defeated by it.
And while there is a very sexual overtone, particularly in Fairhaven critters,
this is not necessarily a rule! Sally the cow could have gotten the babies she
always wanted by forcing your precious bodily fluids out of your limp (or not so
limp) self into her victorious body, but instead she chose to trample you! And
you didn't get any of that nice smelling milk either :|

And that is perfectly fine. Not every defeat needs to be sexual. Not every
defeat needs to be violent either! They can be amusing, sensual, creepy, weird,
twisted, humiliating, or even just a very simple act. They can even do unusual
and special things to you, but giving a guide for special victory coding would
make this guide even larger than it already is. And speaking of large, it is
time to turn to the next page.

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

Page 4 - Victory Messages

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Writing_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 4

2012-11-21T23:49:44Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== A guide on writing your victory messages ==

Victories. We all thought ourselves to be invincible, but the truth is, for a
good part of the game getting beaten up is a fairly common occurrence. But
unlike many games, this one can give delight in defeat!

Each critter should display a nice message when the player gets defeated by it.
And while there is a very sexual overtone, particularly in Fairhaven critters,
this is not necessarily a rule! Sally the cow could have gotten the babies she
always wanted by forcing your precious bodily fluids out of your limp (or not so
limp) self into her victorious body, but instead she chose to trample you! And
you didn't get any of that nice smelling milk either :|

And that is perfectly fine. Not every defeat needs to be sexual. Not every
defeat needs to be violent either! They can be amusing, sensual, creepy, weird,
twisted, humiliating, or even just a very simple act. They can even do unusual
and special things to you, but giving a guide for special victory coding would
make this guide even larger than it already is. And speaking of large, it is
time to turn to the next page.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

Page 4 - Victory Messages

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 2

2012-11-21T23:49:11Z

Ambro:

[[Category:Guides]]
== Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. ==

Consider this description of arms (sans hand):

''"The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticeable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

That sounds fine, right? Quite does.
Now take a look at the description of these legs:

''"The fit and trained humanoid legs show noticeable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

Still fine! That's a fine set of legs there. I want to have that kind of legs.

And you go to describe the rest of the critter. It's all trained, toned, muscly.
I'd tap it. Or knowing the creatures around, they'd probably tap me first.

But how does it look when it's complete?

''"The torso is fit and trained, showing noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. A runners' legs, humanoid, fit and trained, show noticable shapes of veins on top of the impressive musculature."''

See how this got repetitive and annoying? And I even mixed some wordings around,
and changed a few, not even making all those descriptions exactly the same. But
large parts and word constellations are identical enough to show what can be
percieved as laziness or lack of care. It is just tiring to read, as if somebody
repeatedly says the same thing into your ear.

Always remember, the individual body parts must look nice and descriptive by
themselves, since they can be mixed individually on a player, but they -also-
need not to turn out to be repetitive in their descriptions if they all get put
together to form the complete, single critter.

A good help with preventing this from happening is, among things, the use of
different words on the different bodyparts to describe the very same thing,
along with changing order and tone of the description. Always keep a thesaurus
at hand when doing critters, as it is a great aid for finding synonyms. And not
even just synonyms, but different words that bring up the same image. Something
muscular can be toned, athletic, trained, predatory, something a runner or
bodybuilder would have, something that looks like the result of hard workouts,
simply strong, perhaps even of a lethal, predatory strength!

But you know what else takes part in making the above so repetitive? The last
example just now might have shown it; The length of each part's description. The
shorter each description, the more you're prone to repeat yourself when having
to describe the next, potentially similar themed and toned bodypart; A long
description makes it easier to make the descriptions seem different, less
repetitive, even if they are perhaps not. And how to make long descriptions?
See the previous page of this guide!

Okay, consider this:

''"The torso, broad and athletic, would make an athlete proud. It is very toned, yet not overly bulky, with the muscle's strength coming from an inherent, compact powerfulness more than sheer size, the pattern of trained muscle flowing down over the hard abdomen and back. The arms' shapes are firm, shapely tedeons beneath the exterior, able to deliver quick and dangerous blows at a notice. The legs, just like the arms, are powerful and predatory, clearly built for chasing potential pray, and chasing it with an impressive speed."''

There we go. The exact same kind of build was just described, but simply was
made more interesting with sheer variation. You might have noticed that not only
was the wording varied and the descriptions lengthened, but also the whole thing
was spiced up with short mentionings about what the limbs look like they could
potentially do or be used for. If I describe you a metal hammer that could be
used to hammer a nail in, and a metal hammer that could be used to tear down a
wall, I immediately gave you a good idea about how each hammer might be shaped
and sized.

So, that's a fine description, isn't it?

'''NOT!'''

We fell into a little trap there that shall be pointed out on the next page of
this guide.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 7

2012-11-21T23:47:48Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == Closing Words == In the end, the important parts of a critter are creativity, and fueling the imagination of the players. Interesting, well written an..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== Closing Words ==

In the end, the important parts of a critter are creativity, and fueling the
imagination of the players. Interesting, well written and creative mobs are a
delight to many, and things like the Quilled Tousky or Feesh even inspire
special commands and mini-games, just because the critter stands out so much as
a rememberable, unique thing.

Not every critter can be expected to match that. And it's not necessary. As long
as the mob you write is well done, well executed and written with this being a
purely text-based, imagination-fueling medium in mind, everything is alright.

But most importantly: Have fun. Take your time. This is not a newspaper, and
we don't have to release a new mob every week. Even after you wrote your
critter, let it rest for a day, think about it. Chances are, you will get a
sudden new idea, behavior or thing to add to it. Flesh it out, til you are
satisfied with the image.

I hope this guide helped you, and will ultimately make the only reasons for a
rejection and necessary re-submitting due to pure technical reasons like
mistakes in code.

Thank you for having taken your time to read this, and I hope it helped you.

--Ambrosia

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

Page 7 - Closing Words

Monster Writing Guide: Page 5

2012-11-21T23:47:27Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == Keeping Things Interesting == So we keep things, again, non-technical; And by keeping it non-technical, we come to the golden rule of victories: '''..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== Keeping Things Interesting ==

So we keep things, again, non-technical; And by keeping it non-technical, we
come to the golden rule of victories:

'''Make your victories interesting to read'''

You might have noticed that the rule ends with 'Interesting to read'. Why the
'to read' part? Well, because the act described by the victory does not
necessarily need to be interesting in itself.
Sounds confusing? Imagine an enemy. An enemy that, upon defeating you, simply
walks away.

''"As you lay defeated, the creature turns and walks away."''

Well. That's not very interesting. I'll be frank here and say: That's boring. You
fought a fight to the death, and the thing just turns and walks away. To the
reader, that's bland and not very interesting. But ask anybody who ever got
beaten up like that, and they will probably tell you, that it was a very intense
moment that certainly was far from being uninteresting! So let's try to recreate
that atmosphere, while keeping the simple, mundane act of the creature walking
away:

''"As you break down, beaten and bruised, the creature holds still. Their eyes simply lower, following you onto the ground, keeping you in their sight. As you lay, ready and vulnerable to that last, final blow...none comes. The creature simply sneers, their expression showing an utter disgust at your weak, defeated form. They elegantly turn on their feet, straightening, before they move away with the same predatory stride and confidence they approached you with, their mercy...or perhaps your unworthyness...leaving you alive but humiliated on the ground."''

The very same act, the creature simply turning and moving away. But we have
detail, we have atmosphere, even a little tension there! Naturally the latter
will be gone upon reading it over and over, but first impressions do a -great-
deal when encountering a new critter on the grid. It also shows something else:
The critter's -attitude- and some of its -mindset- be it feral or sane, dumb or
intelligent, humble or proud.

All that from not the action itself, but -how- it was done.

'''Describe not only what a creature does on defeating you, but how it does it.'''

A simple rule, but the above example shows how much it can do. Next we'll go
into some do's and especially don't of victories.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 6

2012-11-21T23:47:24Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == Victory do's and dont's == Victories can fall into similar traps that descriptions can. Actually, the first rule to avoid mistakes there is one we alr..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== Victory do's and dont's ==

Victories can fall into similar traps that descriptions can. Actually, the
first rule to avoid mistakes there is one we already heard before:

'''Always consider that a player might have mixed up mutations!'''

This does not particularly matter for the victory the critter imposes on
the player, -however- as soon as the victory is on the player's hand (or
crotch, as the case may be), you need to be careful. Victory messages, first
and third person, done by the player, should either:

1. Not be specific about the player's mutations aside of the groin, or

2. Use code to check the individual mutation parts of the player and adjust
accordingly.

To be honest, there are -a lot- of victories that violate this rule, and are
on the grid. It's not hard to find them, either. A lamia player wrapping around
the victim despite having legs, a tarragon player vomiting acid on the prey
despite only the groin being tarragon. Many of these victories actually come
from a time where checking for the other bodyparts was not possible. Maybe
they will get fixed one day, maybe not. But now that we have the ability to do
such checks, past mistakes should not get repeated.

Likewise, victories, player and critter alike, should do checks for organ
sizes. The victory 'stretching the defeated to bursting' becomes rather silly
if the defeated person is a giant, and you are fairy sized. The same goes for
the body size. While this aspect of victories is not as important as the check
for bodyparts, as it does not quite as much break the illusion, it still can
have a highly positive effect on the creativity of the victory message, and
makes it more immersive and believable.

Also:

'''As soon as genitals matter, write a victory message for each victor and prey gender combination that matters for that victory'''

Male vs. male, male vs. female, female vs. female, herm vs male, herm vs
female, herm vs. herm, Male vs. Neuter, Female vs. Neuter, Herm vs. Neuter,
Neuter vs. neuter.

Quite a lot of combinations there, eh? Not all need to be used. There might be
no diference between a male or a herm abusing a female, or a herm or female
getting their hands on a male, which removes the amount of necessary combi-
nations. Likewise, with the victor being neuter, the gender or the defeated
might not matter...but it could.

It all depends on the theme of the victory message and critter in question.
Note down all necessary combiations that apply to your case before writing the
victories.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 4

2012-11-21T23:47:22Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == A guide on writing your victory messages == Victories. We all thought ourselves to be invincible, but the truth is, for a good part of the game gettin..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== A guide on writing your victory messages ==

Victories. We all thought ourselves to be invincible, but the truth is, for a
good part of the game getting beaten up is a fairly common occurrence. But
unlike many games, this one can give delight in defeat!

Each critter should display a nice message when the player gets defeated by it.
And while there is a very sexual overtone, particularly in Fairhaven critters,
this is not necessarily a rule! Sally the cow could have gotten the babies she
always wanted by forcing your precious bodily fluids out of your limp (or not so
limp) self into her victorous body, but instead she chose to trample you! And
you didn't get any of that nice smelling milk either :|

And that is perfectly fine. Not every defeat needs to be sexual. Not every
defeat needs to be violent either! They can be amusing, sensual, creepy, weird,
twisted, humiliating, or even just a very simple act. They can even do unusual
and special things to you, but giving a guide for special victory coding would
make this guide even larger than it already is. And speaking of large, it is
time to turn to the next page.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

Page 4 - Victory Messages

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 2

2012-11-21T23:47:15Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. == Consider this description of arms (sans hand): ''"The fit and trained humanoid ..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. Repeats are annoying. ==

Consider this description of arms (sans hand):

''"The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

That sounds fine, right? Quite does.
Now take a look at the description of these legs:

''"The fit and trained humanoid legs show noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature."''

Still fine! That's a fine set of legs there. I want to have that kind of legs.

And you go to describe the rest of the critter. It's all trained, toned, muscly.
I'd tap it. Or knowing the creatures around, they'd probably tap me first.

But how does it look when it's complete?

''"The torso is fit and trained, showing noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. The fit and trained humanoid arms show noticable shapes of veins on top of the hard musculature. A runners' legs, humanoid, fit and trained, show noticable shapes of veins on top of the impressive musculature."''

See how this got repetitive and annoying? And I even mixed some wordings around,
and changed a few, not even making all those descriptions exactly the same. But
large parts and word constellations are identical enough to show what can be
percieved as laziness or lack of care. It is just tiring to read, as if somebody
repeatedly says the same thing into your ear.

Always remember, the individual bodyparts must look nice and descriptive by
themselves, since they can be mixed individually on a player, but they -also-
need not to turn out to be repetitive in their descriptions if they all get put
together to form the complete, single critter.

A good help with preventing this from happening is, among things, the use of
different words on the different bodyparts to describe the very same thing,
along with changing order and tone of the description. Always keep a thesaurus
at hand when doing critters, as it is a great aid for finding synonyms. And not
even just synonyms, but different words that bring up the same image. Something
muscular can be toned, athletic, trained, predatory, something a runner or
bodybuilder would have, something that looks like the result of hard workouts,
simply strong, perhaps even of a lethal, predatory strength!

But you know what else takes part in making the above so repetitive? The last
example just now might have shown it; The length of each part's description. The
shorter each description, the more you're prone to repeat yourself when having
to describe the next, potentially similar themed and toned bodypart; A long
description makes it easier to make the descriptions seem different, less
repetitive, even if they are perhaps not. And how to make long descriptions?
See the previous page of this guide!

Okay, consider this:

''"The torso, broad and athletic, would make an athlete proud. It is very toned, yet not overly bulky, with the muscle's strength coming from an inherent, compact powerfulness more than sheer size, the pattern of trained muscle flowing down over the hard abdomen and back. The arms' shapes are firm, shapely tedeons beneath the exterior, able to deliver quick and dangerous blows at a notice. The legs, just like the arms, are powerful and predatory, clearly built for chasing potential pray, and chasing it with an impressive speed."''

There we go. The exact same kind of build was just described, but simply was
made more interesting with sheer variation. You might have noticed that not only
was the wording varied and the descriptions lengthened, but also the whole thing
was spiced up with short mentionings about what the limbs look like they could
potentially do or be used for. If I describe you a metal hammer that could be
used to hammer a nail in, and a metal hammer that could be used to tear down a
wall, I immediately gave you a good idea about how each hammer might be shaped
and sized.

So, that's a fine description, isn't it?

'''NOT!'''

We fell into a little trap there that shall be pointed out on the next page of
this guide.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 3

2012-11-21T23:47:13Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == The hills have eyes. Your arms don't. == ''"Of course my arms don't have eyes, Ambrosia you silly billy!"'' Well, yes, but that's not the point. Loo..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== The hills have eyes. Your arms don't. ==

''"Of course my arms don't have eyes, Ambrosia you silly billy!"''

Well, yes, but that's not the point.
Looking back at the description I put on the last page, you might notice the
following part:

''"The legs, just like the arms, are powerful and predatory, clearly built for chasing potential pray, and chasing it with an impressive speed."''

Aside of the typoing of the word 'prey' (Did you catch it earlier?), lovely legs
there. Would hate to go into a running competition with that one. BUT!
Remember that while the above description might perhaps make perfect sense on
your critters, you always, always need to consider a player having mixed
mutations.

Let me repeat that:

'''Always consider that a player might have mixed up mutations!'''

So, hence my comment about your arms not having eyes. The arms don't know what
the legs look like. The legs don't know what the torso looks like. The forms a
player ends up with will potentially, at some point, be mix and match, so a
bodypart simply must not reference another bodypart. No matter if the arms are
'just like' the legs, no matter if they are 'similar to the head', etc. etc.

It's an absolute nono, and the most potential pitfall is describing the exterior
of the bodyparts on the bodyparts themselves, like feathers or the color or
texture of the skin. '''There is an extra skin bodypart for that!'''

So, so far we are down to:

1. Be descriptive, and be as detailed in your description as to give a good,
accurate image of the critter

2. Don't repeat yourself! Use synonyms, describe what limbs might potentially be
for, always keep in mind that bodyparts might not just be individual mutations,
but also should be non-annoying to read on the singular critter description.

3. At the same time, do not make one bodypart reference another, because of the
exact aformentioned possibility of the bodyparts being mix and matched on a
player. Or even critter!

''"Ha, but I'm making the occulaoctopus! It has eyes on its arms! What now??"''

Er..I give. But not the point. Moving on to the next page after this important
message:

'''Also always consider that a player might have a different gender!'''

That means the player might have breasts, when the normal critter does not.
They might be male, female, herm or even neuter!
Always use 'they' and 'their' instead of his/her/she/he etc. in the
descriptions. if you want a literal "They", simply wrap it in brackets: [They]

''"Are we done with the descriptions yet???"''

Actually...

Actually yes, yes we are. With all the points and guides on the previous three
pages, you should have a good set of guidelines that hopefully will result in
imaginative, interesting to read, non-repetitive descriptions that do not fall
into the trap of mixed mutations and different genders, and should give people a
very good idea about what you are exactly imagining the critter to look like.

But looks aren't all that there is to a beast of the nanite apocalypse, is
there?
After all, Sally the cow might look adorable, but beware her fetish for having
you trampled beneath her mighty hooves!

Which brings us to the next page.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide: Page 1

2012-11-21T23:47:10Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides == '''A general guideline on how to write the descriptions.''' == Imagine a creature. We shall not talk about what this creature is named, or how it beha..."

[[Category:Guides]]
== '''A general guideline on how to write the descriptions.''' ==

Imagine a creature. We shall not talk about what this creature is named, or how
it behaves. That does not quite matter yet. No, we will be talking about what
this creature looks like.

''"This creature has feathers on its head, and a beak, and avian eyes."''

No errors there, no mistakes. But. Would you have been able to imagine the
creature? Perhaps. Roughly. You'd definitely get the image of a bird's head
popping up in your brain. But most importantly: Is it the same birdhead that the
writer of the creature intended you to see? Probably not. It is way too vague.
And that is a problem.

So, when writing monsters, here is the first, most important general rule:

'''Write the creature so that people looking at it, not knowing its name, see (almost) the same image in their head as you do.'''

It's a simple rule, but it is one that many writers do not think about. Which is
natural; The writer has the image of the critter in their head, they write a
description, and upon reading it, they naturally think of the image they had in
their head in the first place as it's still sitting there.

So do this: After writing the description, take a break. Forget all about the
creature's image you were thinking of. Distract yourself. Later, just read the
description, and simply using it paint an image in your mind. Now compare it. Is
it the same creature? Actually actively try to imagine the creature differently
from your original idea, as far as the description allows you to. Is it still
recognizable as the same creature you imagined? If not, your description is way
too vague. The more your description allows people to imagine the creature
differently than your original idea, the more it lacks detail.

"The creature's head is sleek and elegantly avian. A long, black and slightly
curved beak protudes from its face. It's a dark coal in color, and solid enough
to deliver hard blows, the tip coming to a pointy, slightly downward turned end.
The black feathers that cover the head are subtly shiny in their blackness,
depending on how the light falls on them. They are short, but frame the head
closely an densly, flowing backwards elegantly around the creature's equally
dark eyes."

Chances are, you just imagined a crow or raven head. All by adding details,
'fluff' to the same creature's description.

So, again: The less wiggle room the description leaves other player's
imagination to be different from the image you had in your head when you were
imagining the creature, the better. Do not let this drive you into being
overdetailed. You don't need to specify exact lengths, nor exact amounts, or ten
words to describe the color. In the end it does not matter if the raven, that
people are imagining, is 7 feet or 7 feet and 2 inches, or has a little more or
less feathers or muscles in their mind. But they should imagine that raven,
with its cold, cunning expression and those wicked, curved and nasty talons.

Page 1 - General description guideline

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]

Monster Writing Guide

2012-11-21T23:47:03Z

Ambro: Created page with "Category:Guides '''Don't Panic.''' This guide is meant to be an addition to the normal 'help monster writing' helpfile, but while the former is more about the general ru..."

[[Category:Guides]]
'''Don't Panic.'''

This guide is meant to be an addition to the normal 'help monster writing'
helpfile, but while the former is more about the general rules of monster
writing, along with an aid for the coding possibilities, this should be seen as
a guide for good writing, and an inspiration.

Ultimately, the things written herein will be what the quality of the monster
will be judged by, not only by staff, but hopefully also by you. Onward!

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_1|Page 1 - General description guideline]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_2|Page 2 - Repeats Are Annoying]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_3|Page 3 - The Hills Have Eyes; Your Arms Don't.]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_4|Page 4 - Victory Messages]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_5|Page 5 - Keeping Things Interesting]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_6|Page 6 - Victory do's and dont's]]

[[Monster_Making_Guide:_Page_7|Page 7 - Closing Words]]